Obviously she was rescued back in the Iraq kerfuffle and the pretty-blonde-damsel-in-distress meme was big throughout the war. Some occult connection to the name, too, I believe.
Jessica Lynch, pfc. Heroically taking supplies to front line forces she was ambushed by those cowardly sand-niggers, then she fought alongside her fellow soldiers, standing over the body of a fallen comrade, guns akimbo, blowing away those muthas, until treacherously taken from behind and dragged into captivity. Into a world of demeaning sexual torment no man can ever imagine. Then rescued, heroically, by those spec ops commandos, with their rakish, cigar-chewing ways.
Or, more accurately, she fainted when her lorry was ambushed, was taken to a hospital where she was properly looked after, was shot at by Americans when the locals tried to give her back in an ambulance, and was then rescued in a daring raid on an undefended hospital. Take your pick.
Anyway, more recent news. From above top secret we get the remarkable happenings which have proceeded from her rescue for those burly rakish heroes who dragged her from the den of vice in which she was receiving proper medical treatment. Three of them are dead. An "spc", whatever one of those might be, was in a murder-suicide. A marine was in a "single car accident". A marine lance corporal was killed by a mysterious gunman who leant over his fence and took him out, before disappearing never to be seen again.
Odd happenings. I do wonder why they would do this, assuming "they" did it. We already know the entire original story to be lies, what else might these men know?
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